#mind-body-spirit

"Jonesing [10w] Is it odd of me that I'm Jonsesing for strange?"

"When you have done your best and still failed, use Cosmic Ordering."

"Transubstantiation [10w] Transubstantiate digression into confessionand drink from poetry's Holy Grail."

"Selfie [10w] For the millennial generationa selfie is a family portrait."

"There are no prizes for defying yourself."

"Gold Diggers are Always at Two Weddings A gold digger's eyes are searching for her next husband at her wedding."

"Pun vs. Puny [10w] + {Couplet} "His penis was a pun,judging by the predictable groans.The hours set by innuendos,the seconds by the moans."

"Clairol 2: Hair color so natural only her hairdresser knows for sure... ...but he's gay and already Tweeted it to 300 people."

"It sometimes takes a state of solitude to bring to mind the real power of companionship."

"Control [10w] Don't lose control by imagining you can control your lover."

"Optimists vs. Death [10w] Optimists are hopeful people who see a coffin as half-full."

"Deal or No Deal ~ Deal with It "God, please tell me the place I'm going after I dieis filled with bright eyes and bushy tails, or I'm not going."

"Battered Women [5w] Battered womenare more crispy."

"The Gypsy Jackpot An ambulance, a police car and a fire truck parked in front of a gypsy's trailer can only mean one thing ~ insurance scam!"

"♀ Travelers vs. ♀ Tourists [10w] + [10w] Female travelers wear no makeup, stringy jewelry and Jesus sandals.Female travelers wear overcaked makeup, diamond jewelry and Gucci Booties."

"you=""are=""what=""eat"=""[10w]=""That's why I've become a pizza with a pussy topping."

"Whatever you lay your hands on, self-esteem is visible."

"Goat Fucking for Dummies You gently fuck a female goat ~you got to ram the malesto make any progress."

"Speak to the Head [10w] + {Couplet} Tis of no fucking availTo speak to the tail."

"National Rifle Association Credo [10w] God gave us two hands to holdan assault rifle."