#Purpose

"Sharia Justice [10w] Sharia justice is a lynch mob masquerading as Allah's will."

"Food If food comes with a labelthat's warning enough you shouldn't eat it."

"Knowledgeable [10w] The knowledgeable man inventoried and catalogued everything he doesn't know."

"The 2-Step Self-Discovery Program The first step in self-discovery is not giving a shit what anybody else thinks.The second step is knowing you're a self-centered asshole."

"Recipe for Love [10w] Recipe for love:compatibilityattraction ~just add penis and stir."

"Grave Dancing for Dummies {Couplet} They danced at my grave when I was buried at sea;with my haters drowned, I'm now totally free."

"Retail [10w] The first and last sale of the day are best."

"Hook 'em I know how to leave them satisfied and hungry for more ~with a carefully administered shot of insulin."

"From the moment of my birth, I lived with pain at the center of my life. My only purpose in life was to find a way to coexist with intense pain."

"Let's get physical, physical [10w] All physical contact is meaningful,even if meaningful means sleazy."

"Journalist asks me whether I can sit down for an interview... Sorry, I can't talk now. I'm busy writing up a storm.How about tomorrow?Sorry, tomorrow I'm bust conjuring up a tornado."

"The Game Is Afoot God's buried eight jewels within my soul.Life's game is,'Remove each gem, yet find me whole.'The clue is,"Eight is one, and one is eight,no jewel's more precious,all equally great."

"Pacifism There's nothing like seeing action in war to turn a soldier into an instant pacifist or an instant killer."

"❞ [10w] "Let's cuddle like a quotation mark filling a blank page."

"The 'Ugly' Poet [10w] Poets develop cleverness with wordsto compensate for their unattractiveness."

"UPS [10w] Women at work judge the UPS man by his package."

"Optimists vs. Death [10w] Optimists are hopeful people who see a coffin as half-full."

"Valentine's Day 1 [10w] Valentine's Day affirms the promise that love can be sustained."

"Obscenity [10w] Obscenity's undefinable becauseeverything that occurs in nature is natural."

"Beating the Language Like a Tom-Tom with a Mohawk "Actually, you will receive a free pre-owned gift with every purchase,irregardless of the awesome enormity of your stupidity."