#spiritualism

"The Machismo Motto [10w] "When we are not hard as nails we get screwed."

"Persistence If persistence is the foundation of all success, how come persistent liars and nags aren't more successful?"

"The Squeaky Wheel The squeaky wheel ~will put you $374.43 in the holeafter replacing the brake pad, rotorsand $500 with a new master cylinder."

"Regret vs. Good Times "If I had to regret the good times I spent with every lover who eventually disillusioned me,my love life would be reduced to ten seconds."

"Tickled Pink Today,without thinking,I filled my half-empty fish tank, to its brink.Having doubled the size of his universe,my Siamese bettais quite tickled pinkThe same thing happens when you fill my half-empty world with your love.Bai, keep pourin'!"

"National Rifle Association Credo [10w] God gave us two hands to holdan assault rifle."

"Lady Gaga Haiku A cow has a big head, deep voice, a long tongue, butLady Gaga he's not."

"Diplomacy The diplomat's expert way of saying 'They should go fuck themselves' is:"We are agreed in principleand will take our minor differencesunder thoughful consideration."

"Stumble When you don't know how to end a sentence you've stumbled upon a truth."

"Hi-Yo Silver! Away! [10w] "Kimosabe, me wanna fuckum Pamela, pronto.My teepee's blue."Tonto"

"Busch Beer: Head for the mountains... [10w] ...and fall off the precipice shitfaced."

"The Road to Poetry Hell [10w] The road to poetry hell is likepaved with similes."

"Ruminating Poetry A poem should be eaten in one sittingbut regurgitated often like a ruminant's food."

"Poets, Shakespeare and Trash A poet must read equal amountsof trash and Shakespeare to learn how to distinguish between the two."

"Indiscernible Love [10w] True love's so effortless, others can hardly see it's happening."

"Selfie [10w] For the millennial generationa selfie is a family portrait."

"please=""hand=""me=""the=""remote,=""dear."=""[10w]=""The most effective method of birth control is grannie panties."

"Underage-Killers [10w] Underage-killers like making a whooshing sound when they shoot people."

"Love vs. Mental Illness [10w] Love, like mental illness, comes on graduallyand then suddenly."

"Bagels and Lox Life's an everything bagel;love is a schmear of scallion cream cheese;and lox, no matter how you cut it,is resistant to dumbass metaphors."