"Are you OK with pissing people off to succeed? Because that’s what will happen. Success pisses off the unsuccessful."
"I've been trying to start a garage band for over a decade now, but father won't move his car."
"What’s on my mind? I could say you, but we both know I'd be lying. Actually, I'm only pretending that you aren't on my mind. But I know that you don't mind."
"Love will find you eventually, I guarantee it. That’s why you need to buy an invisible cloak from me for the one-time low price of $77,777.77. Offer valid for emotional invalids only."
"I've been trying to start a garage band for over a decade now, but father won't move his car."
"I wonder if rooms in an insane asylum have Do Not Disturb signs for the doors. I should hope not, because knock or no knock, every occupant in those rooms is already disturbed."