More quotes by Scott Adams

"I love you like a fat kid loves cake!"
"It doesn't take many people to have a bad sense of humor to get in trouble at a corporation."
"You're thinking I'm one of those wise-ass California vegetarians who is going to tell you that eating a few strips of bacon is bad for your health. I'm not. I say its a free country and you should be able to kill yourself at any rate you choose, as long as your cold dead body is not blocking my driveway."
"Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt."
"Dance like it hurts. Love like you need money. Work when people are watching. -- Dogbert's Motto"