More quotes by Scott Adams

"Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and he'll buy a funny hat. Talk to a hungry man about fish, and you're a consultant."
"Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt."
"It doesn't take many people to have a bad sense of humor to get in trouble at a corporation."
"Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt."
"I love you like a fat kid loves cake!"