Death cannot stop true love. That’s why it’s pointless for m... - Jarod Kintz, The Days of Yay are Here! Wake Me Up When They're Over.

"My grandpa died yesterday. I ought to know, because I shot him. So come, join me in the fight against patricide by killing your father’s father."

"All the ideas in the universe can be described by words. Therefore, if you simply take all the words and rearrange them randomly enough times, you’re bound to hit upon at least a few great ideas eventually. Sausage donkey swallows flying guillotine, my love assembly line."

"I've been trying to start a garage band for over a decade now, but father won't move his car."

"Reading a book is like having the ability to dip a straw into the author’s soul and sip and slurp without lowering the water table of wisdom."

"I've been trying to start a garage band for over a decade now, but father won't move his car."