"He said he came in second place, so I assumed there were only two competitors. But you never know with love, there may have been a third party involved."
"Two empty chairs are not a good use of space. Fill them up with love."
"She called it a slap, but I called it a high-five to my face. Love is so encouraging!"
"If you don’t know how to love, then any old robot or mechanical device would best suit your relationship style. In this situation, vacuum cleaners might make the best lovers."
"I’m running from the very person I’m chasing, and this is how I know I’m in love."
"My boxers should require batteries, because I’m such an exceptional lover that pizza delivery people call me for carry out. 30 minutes or less—as if!"