Herodotus says, "Very few things happen at the right time, a... - Mark Twain

"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing."

"Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry."

"I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know."

"It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."

"A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain."