I don’t need love. I live in a forest. The quiet is my compa... - Jarod Kintz, A Story That Talks about Talking Is Like Chatter to Chattering Teeth, and Every Set of Dentures Can Attest to the Fact That No..

"The sunset faded and blended from pink to peach to mango in a smoothie in the sky. For as long as she doesn’t love me, I will love her."

"I’m a romantic. I like cold coffee and orgasms that arrive fifteen minutes after I’ve put on my clothes and paid the lady."

"I found your love like I found religion: in an aluminum trashcan in the middle of the Utah desert."

"If my name were C. Ross, I’d definitely be religious."

"Love means never having to say you’re sorry for a minor stab wound."