"I found your love like I found religion: in an aluminum trashcan in the middle of the Utah desert."
"Love means never having to say you’re sorry for a minor stab wound."
"When I’m in a relationship, I love like a burrito. And if you’re a taco, don’t talk to me. At our core we may seem similar, but trust me, we are two different items on the menu."
"The only thing I could love more than you is two of you. And I suppose three."
"A poem for Beth: Roses are red, Violets are blue, I didn’t know what love meant, until I looked it up in the dictionary."
"I want to learn the language of the sun, and burn Agatha’s eyes out with my love poems."