More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Love burns. Whiskey burns. George Burns. What do all three have in common? They’re all dead to me."
"A follow-up letter is best when not written on the back of a suicide note. Remember this next time you’re at a networking event, unless your new connection is a mortician."
"For our first date we went Dutch. We would have gone another nationality, but they are the tallest."
"Every guy says he's not like every guy, thus proving he is like every guy. Show me a guy who's different, and I'll tell you to stop pointing at me."
"If I found 20 dollars on the ground, I’d be willing to bet I’d find someone in desperate need of money that I could give it to. And I’d bet 20 dollars, so even after finding and giving away 20 dollars, I’d have made 20 dollars."