Using my nipples as bait, I went fishing for compliments. I... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Using my nipples as bait, I went fishing for compliments. I got a few bites, but nothing to write about in Field & Stream."

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#humor #writing #Nature #Stream #Bait #Fishing #Random #Fish #Absurd #Field #word-junkies #inner-dialogue #nipples #bites #compliments #field-and-stream #magazine #magazines

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More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I haven't measured it, but I'll bet cat purrs vibrate at a healing frequency. Also, a whispered I love you almost certainly resonates with heart and DNA repair."
"I always wear gloves when I wash my hands. That’s also how I make love, and if you buy now I’ll throw in an extra bar of soap for FREE."
"I observe Stand Still Day. I also observe whatever I’m standing in front of at the time. I hope on that day I see how much you love me."
"I grew a garden in her heart. There was plenty of space for flowers, because her heart was completely empty of love."
"I just sprayed cologne on my hand and then pet the back of my cat's head while he slept, and he woke up so confused, trying to sniff behind his neck and all around wondering what sweet attack he was under."