More quotes by Jarod Kintz, I Want

"I want to write the Boston Marathon of run-on sentences. And since it'll be so long, I'll replace all the commas with the word Gatorade, to help push people through it."
"I want to be a cowboy, but only long enough to barge into a saloon and bellow, "Who's the yellowbelly that stole my happy trail?"
"I want to spend less time talking about myself, and more time listening to what other people have to say about me."
"I want to write the Boston Marathon of run-on sentences. And since it'll be so long, I'll replace all the commas with the word Gatorade, to help push people through it."
"I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair."