I realize all guys have thorns. But I am a rose, and she cho... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I meet people to know I’m not alone. I network like an astronaut on the moon."

"Reading makes you ready for the world. A man who doesn’t read is a man who is easily deceived. You must find that man and make him sign a contract, and you must do it before Satan does. Trust me, the profits are HUGE!"

"You don’t need to have a fight before great sex. I can keep my cool and still bring the heat every time."

"Read her poetry before you make love to her. That way she’ll be asleep when you do. I’m as romantic as a rocking chair with wheels."

"I ate a pound cake today, but I gained two."