I stood and walked around the desk so I could stand over him... - Darynda Jones, First Grave on the Right

"After a long pause in which he took the time to blink several times, he asked, "You named your breasts?"I turned my back to him with a shrug. "I named my ovaries, too, but they don't get out as much."

"Nobody wants to look like a fool. Nine times out of ten, thatreason alone keeps people from allowing themselves to believe."

"I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels."

"You know you have ADD when Look A chicken - T-shirt"

"I may not look like much, but I'm an expert at pretending to be a ninja."