"I water fake plants, because I’m growing a garden of fake mustaches. Lest no man (or woman) question my ability as a lover."
"She didn't say it, I only thought she said it. So really it was my thought, my words, and not hers. How could I confuse "I love you"with "May I take your order?"
"What is pink, blurry, and always leaving when you’re arriving? Love."
"Love is the most amazing feeling in the world. Let me double check. Yep, love is a feeling."
"Stairs, are they going up or are they going down? They’re so confusing! If love were a physical thing, it would be stairs."
"I water fake plants, because I’m growing a garden of fake mustaches. Lest no man (or woman) question my ability as a lover."