"I water fake plants, because I’m growing a garden of fake mustaches. Lest no man (or woman) question my ability as a lover."
"A string of burglaries is a crime necklace. Everything I have can be stolen except love, because I give it all away."
"He said he came in second place, so I assumed there were only two competitors. But you never know with love, there may have been a third party involved."
"She didn't say it, I only thought she said it. So really it was my thought, my words, and not hers. How could I confuse "I love you"with "May I take your order?"
"Two become one when two are in love—or when the waitress asks about our dinner bill. I’ll pay next time, I promise."
"Love is you wearing her favorite shirt of yours, just like you did yesterday and the day before. And the day before that too."