I have never seduced a fish taco for selfish reasons. I am a... - Jarod Kintz, Love quotes for the ages. Specifically ages 18-81.

"We can’t be lovers because we both have mustaches. But since you’re a lady, and I’m a gentleman, I’ll shave mine off."

"The only drink I like ice in is water, because you can’t water down water. I’m like that with love, too. Don’t you dare add any ice to the hot liquid loving I’m trying to pour all over you."

"He said he came in second place, so I assumed there were only two competitors. But you never know with love, there may have been a third party involved."

"We made eyes at each other, and then we made love. We also made other things too, like meatloaf."

"I’d rather have 100% of 5 than 50% of 10—especially with love."