I’d love to create a personal profile on a dating site with... - Jarod Kintz, Great Listener Seeks Mute Women

"Whether you live to be 50 or 100 makes no difference, if you made no difference in the world."

"Everything I’ve ever done, ever thought, ever experienced, and ever felt, has led me up to this moment in my life. And after accumulating and culminating it, all I can say is, “Ahhhhh!"

"Even a fool recognizes that there is great sadness in a bucket of tears. But only a wise man thinks to conserve water and use that bucket to wash his car."

"The easiest way to get from point A to point B is with a vehicle that runs on alphabet soup."

"If my name were Mememem, and I had just ran into someone who should have known my name but couldn’t recall it, I’d probably say, “I can’t believe you don’t remememember my name."