Not only am I thinking about getting a nose job, but I’m als... - Jarod Kintz, Great Listener Seeks Mute Women
"Not only am I thinking about getting a nose job, but I’m also trying to get employment for the rest of my face."
More quotes by Jarod Kintz, Great Listener Seeks Mute Women
"Nothing in this world feels quite like freedom, except for freedom. And nothing in the world tastes quite like freedom, except for fried bald eagles."
"If I ever go to China, I’m going to find a piano and play “Chopsticks”--only not with my fingers, but rather I’ll be using two forks."
"The easiest way to get from point A to point B is with a vehicle that runs on alphabet soup."
"Even a fool recognizes that there is great sadness in a bucket of tears. But only a wise man thinks to conserve water and use that bucket to wash his car."
"Everything I’ve ever done, ever thought, ever experienced, and ever felt, has led me up to this moment in my life. And after accumulating and culminating it, all I can say is, “Ahhhhh!"