If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success? - Jerry Seinfeld

"If a book about failures doesn't sell, is it a success?"

"To me, if life boils down to one thing, it's movement. To live is to keep moving."

"I'm a big believer than a great bit is a great bit - if I go and see someone I love, like Robert Klein. I want to hear some classics and some new stuff. But a great stand-up bit takes a long time to really polish and perfect, and they're beautiful things when they're done."

"Nobody enjoys the 'little show about nothing' humor more than me, but that is never the way I look at it."

"Elaine: Ugh, I hate people.Jerry: Yeah, they're the worst."