If it turns out that there is a God...the worst that you can... - Woody Allen
"If it turns out that there is a God...the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever."
"If it turns out that there is a God...the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever."
"I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia."
"If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans."
"I read in self-defense."
"I hate reality but it's still the best place to get a good steak."
"I just can't listen to any more Wagner, you know...I'm starting to get the urge to conquer Poland."