"If love had feathers and tasted like dog food, then I suggest you wear shoes with your banana pudding. (This statement also defines my political beliefs)."
"Either I will love you, or I will love you if and only if you love me in return. I prefer the former."
"People don’t buy products—they buy people. It’s called slavery. I mean networking. It’s called networking."
"A fridge will keep your steaks fresh, but keeping a live cow in grandmother’s room will keep the meat fresher. Let this be a lesson in love."
"In high school I used to write my love notes backwards, so she'd have to flip the paper upside-down to read it. Either that or read it in a mirror, so she can see herself as I see her, and see why I admire her."
"The roses of romance grow when you water your relationship with gratitude. Love will bloom and blossom when you recognize the awesome."