If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything. - Mark Twain

"I've had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened."

"The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's."

"No man's life, liberty, or property are safe while the legislature is in session."

"All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure."

"Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be."