"In a lot of ways, success is much harder than I thought it would be. I figured that you'd get here and then everything would be happily ever after. But, it's hard work, almost harder once you're successful because you've got to maintain it."
"When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane."
"I just got out of the hospital. I was in a speed reading accident. I hit a book mark and flew across the room."
"If at first you don't succeed then skydiving definitely isn't for you."
"You know those things that you throw the twigs into and it spits them out? That's what I do. The branches are like life, and I throw them into my head and some of it comes out as humor."
"I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full house and four people died."