"In a lot of ways, success is much harder than I thought it would be. I figured that you'd get here and then everything would be happily ever after. But, it's hard work, almost harder once you're successful because you've got to maintain it."
"If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried."
"I like George Carlin's jokes. I like his humor. He's one of my heroes, and I like what he did with talking about everyday things."
"If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?"
"When I was in school the teachers told me practice makes perfect; then they told me nobody’s perfect so I stopped practicing."
"The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?"