The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars,... - Steven Wright
"The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?"
"The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?"
"I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done."
"I like George Carlin's jokes. I like his humor. He's one of my heroes, and I like what he did with talking about everyday things."
"When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane."
"You know how it is when you're reading a book and falling asleep, you're reading, reading... and all of a sudden you notice your eyes are closed? I'm like that all the time."
"In a lot of ways, success is much harder than I thought it would be. I figured that you'd get here and then everything would be happily ever after. But, it's hard work, almost harder once you're successful because you've got to maintain it."