In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific rese... - Bill Watterson

"CALVIN:When I grow up I want to be an inventor. First I will invent a time machine. Then I'll come back to yesterday and take myself to tomorrow and skip this dumb assignment."

"CALVIN:Our hero regains consciousness at the feet of a sarcastic alien."

"The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure poor reasoning and inhibit clarity."

"When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back."

"Years from now, when I'm successful and happy, ...and he's in prison... I hope I'm not too mature to gloat."