More quotes by Lemony Snicket, Horseradish

"Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them"
"Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator."
"Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess."
"If writers wrote as carelessly as some people talk, then adhasdh asdglaseuyt[bn[ pasdlgkhasdfasdf."
"Siblings that say they never fight are most definitely hiding something"