More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"There are two typos of people in this world: those who can edit, and those who can't."
"Dinner was a riot, but the food was bland, so I doused it with pepper spray. The chef wanted to protest, but he didn’t, because I had the pepper spray."
"The darkness has ink eyes, and if you stare long enough, you’re going to see it blink black. That’s the moment to start writing."
"Lightning doesn’t thunder twice. Let that be a lesson in love."
"I once tried to light a joint with a fire ant, but what did I know? I was high on glue and in the third grade, just like grandpa."