More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"My goal is to be as forgiving as a man with amnesia, but love as if I remember and cherish all the things you do that make me smile."
"Pepperonis are like edible polkadots. I made you a pizza dress, but I’m ashamed to admit I burned it. I’m afraid you’ll have to dance naked."
"I give 110% in love. If that seems absurd, just know that I used presidential voting machines to calculate that number. It's totally legit."
"Only a fool would say they’re not a fool. Well, I am not a fool, which is why I say I am a fool."
"She doesn’t want me to leave, and she doesn’t want me to stay. That’s a double helping of Doesn’t Want Me, and one big I’m Not Hungry back at her."