More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I have rubbed shoulders with the rich, the powerful, and the armless. It’s how to network when handshakes aren’t an option."
"I’ve never been in a yesterday quite like today. Seems like the perfect time to be in love."
"Trophies are clutter at best, and weapons at worst. I prefer my awards heavy and with handles."
"The other day I woke up to find my girlfriend already gone from the house, and a sticky note on the fridge that said, "I love you.""Oh my God,"I thought. "Somebody's obsessed with me, and they kidnapped my girlfriend just to get closer to me."
"My currency is kindness, and while there are no ATMs that dispense it, it’s also not accepted or recognized at strip clubs."