More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"My goal is to be as forgiving as a man with amnesia, but love as if I remember and cherish all the things you do that make me smile."
"String several words together in a sentence and you have a language necklace. My I love you would look great with your favorite red dress."
"Steel wool—it’s not just for washing dirty dishes. It also makes great underwear material. It’ll cure that itch to take on a lover by making you scratch."
"I love coffee cake, but I would prefer if it were just a little more drinkable. I almost choked while chugging some this morning, and if it weren’t for the fluid nature of clownfish, I might have caught feelings for Hillary using a basketball net."
"I find out a lot about myself by sleeping. Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me."