My handshake is as firm as cooked spaghetti. So, do you pref... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"I am so extreme that I do parkour like a caterpillar gyrates. My movements are slow and methodical, but eventually my free running takes flight. I love the same exact way, and my romance has the essence of a butterfly."

"When I dance, I’m so fluid you could drink my moves. And if you sip it with your morning coffee, you’ll be light on your feet all day."

"To get people to notice you, you must be unique. If I were invisible, everybody would see me for who I am as a person."

"I loved her as long as a midget. It was gruesome, and then I grew some."

"What makes a good leader? I ask myself this every day, and then as I begin to list off characteristics I realize I’m describing myself. Am I the ideal leader? Let’s just say that if I were running for political office, I know who I’d vote for—twice."