My love is powdered sunshine. Just add water. (Warning: Do N... - Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Professional wrestling is a lot like cuddling, I thought as I hugged a tree. As far as lumberjacks go, I’m slow, but when the tree finally falls for me, it falls hard."

"My words and my ideas are my property, and I’ll keep and protect them as surely as I do my stable of unicorns."

"The roses of romance grow when you water your relationship with gratitude. Love will bloom and blossom when you recognize the awesome."

"Love one person at a time, that’s the motto I’ll try to get my clones to live by."

"Snow is not microwave friendly. In fact, snow is not too friendly at all, unless you first buy it a few beers. Then it’s just downright slutty."