My one regret in life is that I am not someone else. - Woody Allen

"I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens."

"If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans."

"Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good."

"Honey! Bring down a copy of my will - and an eraser!"

"Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon."