"My parents always said that knowledge was the best gift they could give me, probably because they were too cheap to buy me Christmas or Birthday presents."
"I love tables. And dancing. Oh, and I love table dancing, although Grandmother always says, "Wait until we're finished eating."
"Moral codes are like the ocean. Some people live by them, while others, such as myself, would rather live by a lake."
"Sometimes I wish Jim Morrison were still alive, because I'd love to see a concert in which "The Doors"opened up for "The Cars."
"The only time I really think is when I smoke, and I quit smoking years ago."
"The other day I went to the Huddle House. I wasn’t hungry, I just wanted to call some plays."