Patience and wisdom walk hand in hand, like two one-armed lo... - Jarod Kintz, $3.33

"I smiled, and you winked. I think. Perhaps you merely blink with one eye at a time."

"I am a master of logic and a powerfully convincing debater. In fact, against my better judgment, I can talk myself out of doing anything."

"I like to vote, but not be voted on. I don’t mind losing one on one, but to lose through a vote means the majority think I’m a loser."

"I called an insurance company to get a quote. They gave me one of Oscar Wilde’s best."

"Goodbyes, they often come in waves."