Goodbyes, they often come in waves. - Jarod Kintz, $3.33

"Any lustful fool can love a million women, but only a real man can love one woman cloned a million times."

"A stationary bike is a device that epitomizes the phrase “hurry up and wait."

"I am a master of logic and a powerfully convincing debater. In fact, against my better judgment, I can talk myself out of doing anything."

"If you tell me I look like someone you know, I might get panicked and think you’re on to me. I thought nobody saw me abduct that guy and steal his identity."

"The only reason my wife agreed to marry me is because Christian Bale wasn’t around to propose to her."