More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book Has No Title

"If I’m going to write a book every American will want to read, it’s got to have lots of pictures. Those pictures must also move, and all the words in the book must be spoken and available audibly for all the readers to hear as they watch."
"I go to sleep in my business suit, because it makes my dreams of success seem more real."
"I fell in love with her the moment she was late, though neither one of us knew it at the time because she hadn’t arrived yet."
"Love is like a forest, I think as I kill trees by squandering toilet paper while “decorating” my ex girlfriend’s front yard."
"I just bought a small condo overlooking the water. The water is in a cup, one floor below my unit."