More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"She’s ignoring my texts. Maybe she’s dead. Oh, I certainly hope so. I’d hate to think she’s being deliberately unresponsive."
"Using my nipples as bait, I went fishing for compliments. I got a few bites, but nothing to write about in Field & Stream."
"She said she loved me, and I believed her, because she was looking directly at another man when she said it."
"I'm offering you love on a stick. If you'd like, you can grab it to go. It’s like a popsicle, only it won’t melt if you put it through hell like you did with you last boyfriend."
"The difference between you and everyone else, is everyone else. And that’s a lot, so you should feel special."