"She has a sly smile, and eyes that seem to see my essence as they explore my soul and implore my spirit to enter her. I look at her and I see love."
"Drink my Distraction Juice (not from concentrate). It tastes like love, only not so focused on just one ingredient."
"I’m running from the very person I’m chasing, and this is how I know I’m in love."
"We can’t be lovers because we both have mustaches. But since you’re a lady, and I’m a gentleman, I’ll shave mine off."
"Love is like jumping out of an airplane with no parachute. But there’s no need to be frightened, because that plane is still on the ground."
"Love is like learning to ride a midget, which I’ve never done because I’m afraid of heights."