"The only drink I like ice in is water, because you can’t water down water. I’m like that with love, too. Don’t you dare add any ice to the hot liquid loving I’m trying to pour all over you."
"I spray-paint my underwear gold, because it makes me feel like a winner. When two people are in love, one is always in second place."
"A crate full of discreet would appear to be empty. But it’s not. It’s full of my love for you."
"Love is the most amazing feeling in the world. Let me double check. Yep, love is a feeling."
"You tell me you love me, but I’m not sure you know what love is, or how fast it flies, or how much it resembles a UFO, or what kind of weapon you’d use to shoot it down."
"A string of burglaries is a crime necklace. Everything I have can be stolen except love, because I give it all away."