"She has a sly smile, and eyes that seem to see my essence as they explore my soul and implore my spirit to enter her. I look at her and I see love."
"We can’t be lovers because we both have mustaches. But since you’re a lady, and I’m a gentleman, I’ll shave mine off."
"I am the broth of love. Make soup to me."
"Two become one when two are in love—or when the waitress asks about our dinner bill. I’ll pay next time, I promise."
"You catch more flies with honey than you do with chopsticks. Let this be a lesson in love."
"In a blind taste-test, my kisses were rated as Helen Kelleresque. Women love how the only sense I keenly possess is nonsense."