"The Book of Life, I’m still writing it—both literally and literarily. So far I’ve written the Table of Contents. Right now it’s more of a coffee table."
"I’ve only been in love one time, I said as I held up my pinky finger. I could have held up my index finger, but I wasn’t in love that long."
"Blood may be thicker than water, but it's certainly not as thick as ketchup. Nor does it go as well with French fries."
"Lightning doesn’t thunder twice. Let that be a lesson in love."
"I loved how your cheeks had a natural rouge, like a delicate rose, and I was a rogue full of thorns. I was only a flower when I was with you."
"The other day I woke up to find my girlfriend already gone from the house, and a sticky note on the fridge that said, "I love you.""Oh my God,"I thought. "Somebody's obsessed with me, and they kidnapped my girlfriend just to get closer to me."