"The French have a new president, the British will soon have a new P.M., and we envy them as we endure the endless wait for this small dim man to go back to Texas and resume his life."
"Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car."
"Humor has to surprise us; otherwise, it isn't funny. It's a death knell for a writer to be labeled a humorist because then it's not a surprise anymore."
"Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car."
"Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose."
"I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it."