More quotes by George Carlin

"The planet is fine. The people are fucked."
"How can He be perfect? Everything He ever makes...dies."
"In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem."
"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"
"I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood."