More quotes by George Carlin

"I was thinking about how people seem to read the bible a lot more as they get older, and then it dawned on me—they’re cramming for their final exam."
"In America, anyone can become president. That's the problem."
"I tried to believe that there is a God, who created each of us in His own image and likeness, loves us very much, and keeps a close eye on things. I really tried to believe that, but I gotta tell you, the longer you live, the more you look around, the more you realize, something is fucked up."
"There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls."
"The planet is fine. The people are fucked."