More quotes by Jarod Kintz, This Book is Not FOR SALE

"Both of the items were used in an attempted murder, but hers was a dagger, and mine was a baby’s rubber bottle nipple. That was the last time I took a stab at love."
"When people ask me how I slept, I tell them I don’t know—I’ll have to ask The Professor, and read his notes on my performance."
"I have the superhero gift of invisibility. I must be invisible, because the woman I love doesn’t see me. I might as well be into Helen Keller."
"If I told you that my global audience has shot up 100% in the last six months, what would you say? If you were to say, “So you went from one reader to two readers?” you’d be absolutely correct. And after I had congratulated you on your keen guess, I’d thank you for being 50% of my reading base."
"I love letting her know how much she means to me. A love in secret is but a shadow that’s cold and lonely."