The sun's gone dim, and the moon's gone black. For I loved h... - Dorothy Parker

"If you have any young friends who aspire to become writers, the second greatest favor you can do them is to present them with copies of The Elements of Style. The first greatest, of course, is to shoot them now, while they’re happy."

"It costs me never a stab nor squirm / To tread by chance upon a worm. / Aha, my little dear, / I say, Your clan will pay me back one day."

"Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses."

"The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires."

"I require three things in a man: he must be handsome, ruthless, and stupid."