The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a f... - Mark Twain

"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything."

"I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."

"All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence; then success is sure."

"In religion and politics people’s beliefs and convictions are in almost every case gotten at second-hand, and without examination, from authorities who have not themselves examined the questions at issue but have taken them at second-hand from other non-examiners, whose opinions about them were not worth a brass farthing."

"Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside."